By Phil Linehan

On throwing his hat into the ring Obama felt he must give voters a good reason
why they should think of him as the man for every season.
His Swahili name, he boasts, signifies one blessed by a God Almighty.
To make us love him can he be hinting it’s the one called Aphrodite?

To elderly Jewish ladies, when he wanted it’s origin to describe.
he said it was a Hebrew name, could it be from a Lost Tribe?
No need to explain the background of his second name Hussein,
which was very seldom heard as he embarked on his campaign.

He feels that, to be fair, he must give every ethnic group its place,
and he leaves no stone unturned as he covers every base.
So, as to reach out to those of every background he desperately seeks,
why have we not heard as yet any mention of the Greeks?

He says his U.S. family is connected to a Native American forebear
although exactly to which one he did not. I believe, declare.
To present himself as an African-American he has also managed to contrive.
but is one allowed to ask in which slave ship did his ancestors arrive?

One talent he does have and that no-one can refute
is his ability to talk the talk in a way that’s most astute.
His gift of the gab with which he would us all beguile
can only be inherited from the O’Bamas in what is called the Emerald Isle.

So there he stands before us, he who claims to be Everyman
as we wonder when we’ll hear he has relations in Japan.
Why is it that whenever on TV he stood up and spoke
all I could see on the screen were his mirrors and his smoke?

The captivated press guys punched their laptops and set their emails humming
as they wrote of Barack Obama as they would the Second Coming.
And they lauded him as a potential saviour of the nation
oblivious, it would seem, he was a Messiah of their very own creation.

With his smooth talk he mesmerized many a TV talking head
and few, if any, complained about the pap they were being fed.
As he claimed he’d ban donations from special interests and lobbyists as well,
on the cash they gave to his campaign the reporters did not dwell.

One thing he supports wholeheartedly, is what he calls free trade
yet he swears that, if elected, he will tear up every agreement ever made.
What he believes is trade that’s free, we should not be at all surprised
is flooding foreign markets with U.S. goods that are heavily subsidized.

He furiously rants against two-way trade with Mexico and Canada
and swears he will stop their exports if he becomes the Big Enchilada.
With a wink an aide told the Canadian Ambassador it was one of his boss’s jokes
meant to appease complaining Ohio workers whom Obama calls “the folks”.

If to look at his government’s trade figures he had only taken the trouble
he would see that since NAFTA U.S. exports to Mexico are double.
So if he is ever in a position to give the trade agreement opt out order
the loudest cheers will be heard from south of the U.S.-Mexico border.

His friendship with Tony Resko, charged with money laundering and extortion
has been, he claims, by critics blown out of all proportion.
On talk about his land deal with fraudster Nadhmi Auchi he hopes to put a brake
by saying buying his Chicago mansion from him was a “boneheaded mistake”.

How many more boneheaders may we expect will be revealed,
when diggers begin to search for any that so far may have been concealed?
If media talking heads and scribblers tried to analyze what Obama has to say
they would realize it has the same substance as a sad collapsed soufflé.